Going back..a little

I want to go back for a minute.  Back to the day, before I was told something was wrong with my unborn child.  Back when, that part of me knew what was about to happen, but admittedly did not want to claim the truth.  The day before I went into the hospital, I had a scheduled ultrasound with a new doctor in my town.  I left work early that morning with an uneasy feeling in my entire body.  I walked into the examine room, changed into that awful backless gown and laid face up on the table.  The nurses rubbed gel on my belly as I looked at the enormous monitor overhead.  The nurse said “hmm”.  With that, I knew it was a confirmation of what I did not want to claim.  There was little movement in my belly surrounded by very little fluids.  It was if my child was floating in the shallow end of the pool, grasping for air.  That IMAGE!!! GOD THAT IMAGE!!!! Everything after that particular moment was somewhat of a blur.  As with all bad news, we tend to loose our complete focus of true reality.  And this truth reality sucked!!!! No other words can describe it…#helpinghealhearts…