The next hour

The days following this journey that I was embarking were filled with denial, depression and unwanted vulnerability. I guess I went on autopilot mode. Part of me knew I had to find a way to get myself up and make a living..Going to work....paying the bills..etc... I had no one else to fall back on, so that is what I did. Woke up early each morning with pain in my body and went to work.  Returning to work, people embraced me with hugs and a love that my soul could not feel.  One young lady approached me and asked if I would pray for her.  She was about to give her life over to Christ and wanted my encouragement.  How could I encourage her and I'm not sure  where my GOD is anymore.  Somehow without hesitation, I took her to the side, prayed for her and she hugged me....And yet again I felt nothing...Through this pain, people still came to me for support... Pulling from me...Pulling from the little spirituality I had left...Pulling from me the small amount of energy I had remaining just to STAND...